Sing Your Song: Reflections of relationships past and present

I have to admit…I am bored to death with the “health week” posts…I need a break from it and want to talk about something juicy.  Like relationships and other related things. It’s a little off the grid but fits the mood.

Last night, I was catching up on some reading and came across a great article by Tad Friend titled “The Ex Files”. It was an overview of all of his past relationships and why they didn’t work out. There was a particular relationship that struck me and inspired me to write this today.

We all struggle on some level or another on what makes the perfect mate. We all try to transform, conform, imitate and deny trying to define what we feel is ideal all the while trying to figure out who we are as individuals and what we want from the relationship. Of course I am no expert on the subject, however, I am an everyday girl in an everyday world trying to cope with the daily lives of myself and others. Here are my thoughts…

We have a vision of perfection or ideal relationship that we refer to and try to live by. Often this is comprised of experience, memory and dreams. After I read the article above, I reflected on my own past relationships and tried to come up with a cheesy analogy that people could relate to. Here it goes…

There was my first love, undeniable and unforgettable. We still are in touch to this day and very good friends supporting each others ventures. He is an old hit that you hear on the radio every few years and you crank it up and sing out loud with your car windows down and don’t really care who’s looking or listening and then continue on as if you never did it.

There was the long-term love that was a friend and a mentor, fine tuning my rough edges preparing me for life’s successes. He was supportive and true and best of all, pure. He is like a classic song that never gets old and forever inspires you. An old “blue eyes” in his own right.

There was the passionate crazed affair that was short lived but exciting non-the-less. It was all or nothing and nothing was the better choice. I learned that the vision of what I wanted and the actual were completely opposite. I envisioned the “perfect” relationship in my mind and attempted to create it in real life failing miserably. He was like a pop song on the top of the charts for a few weeks and now could be the star of “Where Are They Now”.  All the craze while popular but completely and totally forgettable.

A fond memory is of an old friend and lover who has always been true to himself and his being. We would come together in passing and share the winds of change never forgetting our bond. It’s like the bass line in music; always there, subtle but the core of the band. Without it, the music is not the same. Alone, without the rest of the band, one dimensional.

My favorite love, is my current love. Strong, endless, creative, romantic charming and fun. He isn’t a song that I would hear on the radio or put on a CD. He is the one that sings to me….he plays my song and I sing back.

Here’s to finding the one that sings your song.



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